The Best Ways to Keep a Conversation Going
Guys, here’s the bottom line: If you can’t keep a conversation going, you can’t be a badass with women. The good news is… with consistent effort and practice, you can master this skill. Don’t worry if you don’t have a natural “gift of gab.” With consistent effort and practice over time, you can get better results with women than your silver-tongued brethren. That’s because you’ve developed a core foundation of skills for any situation you’ll encounter.
If you have multiple ways to sustain a conversation, it creates more curiosity in the mind of a woman. She’ll be thinking to herself: “I wonder what he’s gonna say next?” This keeps her guessing, and wards off the biggest enemy and attraction-killer for a woman: Boredom. You may not be “The Most Interesting Man In The World” from the Dos Equis commercials, but you’ll be a lot more interesting than most guys who don’t practice these conversation keys.
Let’s get started – here are the top 5 ways to keep a conversation going:
1. Ask genuine, non-threatening questions
Most women are wary of PUA games, tactics or weird language from guys. If you try any of these tricks and they aren’t congruent with your personality, at the best you’re probably off to a bad start – and at the worst, she’s mentally blown you off. The best way to set yourself apart from other guys is to ask authentic questions… without an agenda or hidden motive. A woman needs to trust and feel safe around you before she’s willing to spend more time in a conversation. Real badasses don’t rely on canned lines, they have the confidence to express genuine opinions and questions.
2. Observe and be perceptive
When you get in the habit of paying attention to your surroundings – people, places and things – you’ll almost never run out of things to say. It’s a rare man who actually does this, and it’s a very attractive trait to women. Just make sure whatever you say is accurate and genuine, and you don’t have an agenda behind it. Women have built-in, finely-tuned BS detectors, and if she feels you’re not being truthful with her (or you’re saying something just to get her into bed)… it’s game over, and you’re done.
3. Don’t let her see you sweat, keep it light
Most women spend a lot of time worrying about any number of topics. A guy who can keep her mind off the worries of the world is someone she’ll want to spend more time with. Big-screen badasses like Clint Eastwood, Sylvester Stallone or John Wayne never looked worried, and were able to handle whatever situations that came up. And they added an occasional dose of good humor to show they were in control. A woman will follow your social lead, based on how you come across and make her feel. Women like being around guys who make them feel safe and secure – and you can do this by staying calm, cool and relaxed.
4. Be an active listener
One of the best ways to keep a conversation going isn’t by being the smoothest talker, or monopolizing the conversation – but instead, being the best listener. This may not come easily or naturally to you at first – especially if you’re an extrovert, or are nervous in social situations. Even if you have to bite your tongue waiting for someone to finish their thought or ideas, do it. People like other people who let them talk, and women will respect and appreciate you more. When you practice being an active listener, you’ll become more relaxed in all social situations.
5. Stay “present” and in the moment
As guys, we think about a lot of things: The idiot that cut us off in traffic… what time tonight’s game starts… or what band is playing this weekend – and we don’t focus on the person or situation right in front of us. We tend to be “up in our head,” or nervous, thinking about what has or might happen – or what an attractive woman might think of us. This mental chatter prevents you from being truly focused on the person or conversation at hand. For women it’s called being “present,” and it’s absolutely HUGE.
A female friend of mine said: “Being present is EVERYTHING.” This means you’re truly engaged in a conversation, contributing and giving genuine feedback. You aren’t nodding like a bobble head doll, or mindlessly saying “uh-huh” or “yeah” every so often. Women aren’t fooled at all when you do this. You’ll appear lazy or apathetic, and she definitely won’t think you’re a badass.
Like anything, you’ll have to put in time and effort to develop this skill – but the payoff in better business and personal relationships is HUGE. It’s the social equivalent of hitting a million-dollar jackpot in Vegas.
Conversation is just one of the skills needed to be a Badass with women. If you try to learn these skills and attitudes on your own without any guidance, you’re in for a long, ego-bruising journey (like I went through). Don’t try and “re-invent the wheel” when it comes to your social life. I don’t believe in gimmicks, games or PUA tricks (which always fail in the long-run). I do believe in good, solid information that can help you become the rare man who can attract – and keep – a quality woman in your life. Check out the Tao of Badass book and members area, and give yourself the well-deserved gift of great relationships with the opposite sex.